It’s odd to be talking about this as an adult.  But as I’ve processed the ramifications of growing up without a father, I’ve realized the increadible hole in my heart this absence has left.  I wish my father and I had a friendship and that he would call once every couple weeks and tell me I was doing a good job.  I hunger for this.  I don’t actually like thinking about this stuff, but I have a sense wounds don’t heal until you feel them.

What I mean is, I could lash out against the world for the rest of my life and never stop to do the hard work of asking why I’m angry or why I feel pain, then come to the difficult truth that the pain is there because I wanted to be loved, and I wasn’t.  I wanted to be important to my father, but I wasn’t.  I wanted to be guided, but I wasn’t.  And then, honestly, to feel whatever it is that hard truth creates—to respond in the way I need to respond.

Life has a way of presenting you ways to respond.  My father, who I hadn’t seen in over five years, called me out of the blue late lastyear.  I ignored his calls for a few weeks, not knowing what to say, until my mom urged me to call him back.  He was in North Carolina for business and wanted to get together.

For the first time since I was 12, my dad and I hung out.  We got lunch at Waffle House, he played with my dog, we got coffee at Whole Foods.  He apologized for not being around, and I forgave him.  We decided to forget the past and move forward with a relationship, no matter how non-traditional it had to be.  He promised to make himself available, and I promised to pick up the phone (as long as he didn’t try to tell me what to do… I hate that).

Most importantly, we promised to end the sad family tradition of sons and fathers not having any relationship.  I made a promise to myself to end some destructive behaviors and to prepare for fatherhood myself — not now, unless someone knows something I don’t know, but whenever that day comes.

I immediately had flashbacks of being a gangly 17-year-old, packing up his room in Alabama to move to Chapel Hill for school.  Eight years later, I can’t believe how thrilling life has been and how much I’ve grown during my time at Carolina and the four years after.  I had a lot of fun and learned some great lessons.

If I had to do it all again, I wish someone had told me these things before I started college:

Carve your own path.  There will be immense temptation to spend four year following a group and being singularly focused.  Sample all there is in college and move to the beat of your own drummer.

Take business and Econ classes. No matter your major, learning about business will be very useful when you are in the working world.  And make sure you spend more time on internships than campus activities.  Sadly, employers value work experience more than club activities and will not care that you were the president of a fraternity.  In fact, they might make fun of you for it.

Stay in shape! Run, lift weights, swim, go to the Student Rec Center, rock climb, hike, eat healthy!  It’s too easy to live off of pizza, beer, and Mexican food for four years and avoid exercise like the plague.  I gained 40 pounds in college, and it’s taken me four years to lose it.  (I did lose it, though, so high five.)  Your confidence, health, and happiness will be much better if you take care of yourself physically.

Talk to your mom and dad. They’re a lot cooler than you think.

Don’t be too hard on yourself. Mistakes will happen, classes will be hard, you’ll embarrass yourself, people won’t like you, girls will reject you (again and again and again, sadly).  Remember that there are plenty of fish in the sea.  At Carolina,there are over 20,000 undergraduates, 19,982 of which didn’t see you trip on the bricks and drop all your books while walking to class.  Life is a lot easier once we stop taking it so seriously.

Stay centered in who you are. College brings a lot of fun opportunities but just as many awkward situations come along from ethical dilemmas to conflict, from sex to booze and drugs.  Remember what your values are, and avoid choices that contradict them.  Even if you try things you “shouldn’t,” being true to yourself will ensure you won’t end up in too much trouble if things go poorly.

It’s okay to not have it all figured out. Overachievers like to have all the answers, but know that sometimes – okay, 95% of the time for me – you will have no clue what you want to do or what the future holds.  That’s okay!  It’s completely normal, and most people who act like they have it all figured out are frontin’, in the words of Pharrell (or Jamie Cullum for you indie, hipster kids).  Hell, I’m 25, and I don’t know exactly what I want to be when I grow up.

Have fun. Skip class, play Frisbee on the quad, go on a cool Spring Break trip, attend concerts, root for the Tar Heels at every opportunity, eat at Sutton’s Drug Store, have rich conversations at 3:15AM with your next door neighbor.  Four years goes by faster than you think.  Savor every moment of it.  If you don’t, you’ll be a crotchety twenty-something with regrets.

What advice do you wish you had before you started college?  Post them here or on Facebook.

I’ll try to post something a few times each week to prompt discussion.  I’ll only be blogging about things of personal interest:  personal growth, travels, music, and the outdoors.

I hope we can get a good little community going here and start some good discussions.  If you have any ideas or feedback, let me know.

Being busy, traveling, and dealing with tough person news is difficult to manage for anyone, but it’s especially tough for those of us who battle perfectionism. Two weeks ago, I felt extremely frustrated and overwhelmed with everything on my plate, when I had to take a deep breath and figure out how I can pursue my goals while avoiding burnout.

My thoughts led to me making five mid-year resolutions:

Accept that there’s no real Superman: Realize and understand that no matter how talented or bright you may be, you can’t do everything.

Not being in the office much this past month has created a long to-do list at work and left some personal things neglected. I found myself getting more and more stressed, simply by the number of things on my plate, but I finally realized that it’s virtually impossible for me to get to everything in the time I’d like to and that it’s okay. I’ll do my very best to get to what I can each day, and eventually, I’ll get caught up.

Refocus on priorities: Concentrate on the things that matter most to you.

I wrote down the things that were important to me and pared the list down to the top 5 things in my life (in order): friends and family, time outdoors, excelling at work, volunteering, and blogging. I’m making sure that the tasks I work on at any given time fit within those five priorities, and any new projects or opportunities have to fit within a priority or else I won’t pursue it.

Simplify life by letting go of things. Eliminate the optional tasks that you genuinely don’t have time for or don’t enjoy doing.

After looking at my priorities, I evaluated the things I’ve been neglecting to see if they’re things I can realistically give time to. I made a tough decision to leave the board of one of the organizations I volunteer for and donate to. Although I love the organization and its work, my work and personal demands aren’t allowing me to give the organization the attention it needs from a board member. I’m doing the group a favor — allowing them to find a board member who can be more active — and taking one big item off of my to-do list. It’s okay to cut things and say no.

Take time for self: Each day, do something that fun and personally fulfilling to you.

I need to make sure that I spend time each day doing something that I enjoy doing — not something to please someone else or that I feel obliged to do. It’s as simple as walking my dog each afternoon or reading a book. It means curbing my travel schedule so that at least two weekends each month are spent at home instead of on the road or in a plane. Time at home to catch a baseball game, go on a hike, or simply veg out on the couch is important.

And it means not answering the phone. Our technology dependency has created the expectation that people are always available, and we feel the urge to immediately answer the phone or respond to each voicemail. My recent purchase of a Crackberry has only made me even more guilty of it. Over the past few weeks, though, I’ve turned my phone off when doing personally fulfilling things or simply refused to answer when the phone gives that oh-so-familiar buzz. I can ignore it because I have to create time to catch my breath and do things that I enjoy.

Accentuate the positive: Instead of focusing on what hasn’t been done, think of all the things you’ve accomplished.

I am notoriously self-critical, and while it can sometimes be a great motivator, I often create more stress than external factors do. The other week, I caught myself thinking solely about what tasks at work I haven’t gotten to (donors I need to call, emails I haven’t sent, etc.). When I finally thought about the things I had gotten to (getting three major donor receptions off the ground, sending a 4,000-piece mail appeal, and submitting four grant proposals), I quickly realized that the pluses far outweigh the minuses. As my girlfriend tells me, I need to be far nicer to myself at work and concentrate on actual accomplishments versus pending tasks.

I can tell a marked difference between my mood a few weeks ago and how I feel now. The list of things that have to get done haven’t changed too much, but I’m more confident about the rest of the year and ready to move forward — with much less stress.

My advice: Nip overt ageism in the bud. Make it clear that you won’t tolerate blatant disrespect and that you expect to work professionally and equally. Otherwise, the problem behavior will continue and you’ll never gain respect within the organization. The key to this is choosing the right approach, though.

Sometimes you have to kill them with kindness. During the second week of my first political job — consulting a state-wide organization while doing constituency organizing — a 70-year-old activist walked up to me during an important meeting and yelled, “Who in the hell hired this kid?”

I wanted to tell the lady where to shove it, but she’d become one of the most vocal activists in the state over a 40-year career.

I bit my tongue and said, “Maam, I didn’t hire myself, so you’ll have to take that issue up with people far higher on the totem pole.” It created a laugh in the room, and I continued by saying, “There’s no changing the fact that we have to work together, so I ask that you do me a big favor and share your wealth of knowledge with me so we can both be successful.”

Her mood changed drastically and the meeting moved forward without incident. After the meeting, I got several comments for handling her outburst, and I was able to talk with her one-on-one and convince her to start getting lunch with me regularly.

So when you’re faced with ageism from someone with authority and respect within your organization and whom you have to work alongside, you might have to consider the nice route by:
- Being humble and as nice as you can
- Showing respect for their age and experience
- Asking them to mentor you (realizing you don’t have to take their advice)

Basically, you want to make the potential adversary feel like they are a partner in your success.

Other times, you have to show authority. I worked full-time through undergrad, and in one of my jobs, I managed a housing complex near the university. Part of my responsibility was managing 100 tenants, 12 staff, and our relationship with a food service and janitorial company.

Within three months of my job, my main contact with the food service company — a 50-year-old guy with over 30 years experience in the field — began going over my head when he disagreed with my decisions, saying “Young guys don’t get it.” Luckily, my bosses didn’t micromanage, but I knew I had to stop this pattern quickly.

I called the guy into my office for a one-on-one meeting and began it by saying, “Look, I may be young, but I’m not a fool. I respect you, but I sign your check and I should hear your concerns directly instead of from my supervisors. Please don’t go above my head again, or we’ll have issues. I would hate to see you lose this account due to insubordination.”

It was extremely difficult for me to be so stern (I’m usually a happy go lucky guy), but it was necessary. He stopped going over my head and brought concerns directly to me, which made it much easier to be effective in the job.

So when you’re faced with overt ageism from a direct report, consider showing authority by:
- Having one-on-one conversations
- Being direct and authoritative
- Showing respect for their age and experience, while asking for the same
- Clarifying roles and responsibilities
- Indicating potential outcomes if problem behavior doesn’t change

Basically, you want to make the potential adversary feel like you are a partner in their success.

These are two methods that have helped me deal with overt ageism. Stay tuned for strategies to deal with inconspicuous — but still troublesome — examples of ageism in the workplace.

This conventional wisdom often leads organizations to completely ignore young donors, but they are making big mistakes if they don’t build donor relationships with millennials.

Millennials are willing to give. The Center on Philanthropy at Indiana University (working with Campbell & Company consultants) released an excellent report confirming that millennials are just as likely as any other generation to donate. In a study of 10,000 people representing each generation, the average giving level of millennials is on par with that of other generations.

The study also found that millennials are more likely than any other generation to cite the “desire to make the world a better place to live” as a key motivation for their philanthropy. According to the Association of Fundraising Professionals, this response suggests that younger donors will respond better to messages that focus on the global impact of an organization’s work.

Millennials are willing to raise money. From activities like Jump Rope for Heart to collegiate dance marathons, philanthropy has been part of most millennials’ complete educational careers. Fundraising allows us to scratch the entrepreneurial itch, and more college and even high school students are stepping up to the philanthropic plate.

Non-profits would be remiss to not engage students in their fundraising efforts. My organization, the Ronald McDonald House and Family Room of Durham, is working with Duke University through DukeEngage, a program that places Duke students in summer internships at non-profit agencies. Our great interns are engineering a program called Schools of Hope that will engage local elementary and high school students in fundraising for the Ronald McDonald House.

Millennials are willing to take on executive volunteer roles and make major gifts. I serve on the board of Traction, a 501c3 organization that engages young people in civic life, and I’m a major donor to both Traction and the Ronald McDonald House. My best friend Josh is a trustee of his church and contributes over 10% of his salary to the church and it’s non-profit foundation. We both deduct manageable amounts each month from my paycheck that add up to major gifts for the organizations.

One of the best ideas I’ve heard is from Tracey, a VP for Development at the United Way who commented on my blog over at Brazen Careerist. Her organization is starting a Young Leaders Society to encourage major giving among 20 and 30-somethings.

And millennials could become lifetime donors. Investing in young donors now can be very profitable for organization’s long-term success. Getting a donor engaged in her 20s — even at a low-dollar level — and effectively stewarding her generosity could develop a lifetime donor. Over a potential 30+ year relationship, donations will grow with her income and she’d be perfect for capital projects and planned giving as years go on.

Universities have long realized these points. UNC, my alma mater, begins donor relationships from the day you enroll. Their HeelRaisers Society and senior campaigns even allow students to network and solicit other students via Facebook. Once you graduate, you’re invited to join the Young Alumni donor network and given “discounts” to join the University’s highest giving societies.

The sooner non-profit organizations borrow these ideas and engage with young donors, the better their outlook for the future.

Many people’s approach to vacation is flat-out wrong. They leave home, but spend every waking moment tied to a Crackberry, send emails at the same frequency that they do in the office, jump on conference calls while gone, and even do serious work on vacation (crunching numbers, writing reports). They ignore their loved ones and annoy the heck out of coworkers who think, “Aren’t they supposed to be on vacation?”

Each person needs time to recharge and renew, and with millennials focus on personal life, we need to make sure we have real vacations that boost our happiness and send us back to work ready to roll:

Pick a place you can explore. Don’t take time off of work to just veg out on your couch; go somewhere that has things to do and explore. The Outer Banks has beaches, two bodies of water, several national parks and historical sites, museums, lighthouses, wildlife, and great restaurants. Pick a vacation spot that is beautiful and allows you to do things that you will enjoy.

Go on a technology fast. Most people don’t have relaxing vacations because they stay tethered to work and home stress through electronic communication. Your vacation should free you from all communications with the office and anything that will stress you. I left my laptop and PDA at home, I turned my cellphone off for the entire trip, and I left my watch in the car.

Relax like never before. Sleep in, read, walk, hike, talk — do whatever it is you need to relax. During the work week, caffeine is usually my friend because I’m a chronic insomniac, so on vacation, I slept in every day to catch up. I never get to read for recreation, so I finished Good to Great on vacation, which was a phenomenal read. It allowed me to return to work recharged (and get on a more regular sleep schedule).

Consider roughing it (or at least connect with nature somehow). For me, there’s nothing more relaxing than being in nature. I love hiking, cycling, and just being outdoors. We camped at the Outer Banks — tents, outdoor stoves, the whole nine — and the simplicity of life was such a healthy change of pace. But if you are one of those folks who just can’t go too rough, at least pick a vacation spot that will allow you to connect with nature in some way, be it a short hike or walk along some water.

Most importantly, be introspective. For a good amount of time each day, my girlfriend and I split and did our separate things. I’d go shopping for supplies or food while she stayed at camp, or she’d go do a small hike while I read on the beach. While you’re alone, be sure to do some soul searching and think about where you’re at in your career and life.

Here are some questions I asked myself:
Am I happy? At work and with life as a whole.
Am I accomplishing my goals and concentrating on my work and personal priorities?
How can I simplify my life, and what stresses do I need to simply let go?
What am I doing really well, and what do I need to improve upon?
Where do I think I want to be professionally a year from now?

I came out of that internal conversation realizing that I’m extremely happy — perhaps the happiest I’ve ever been. My job is a great match for me and fulfilling, I’m making progress on my goals, and my life in general is at a place that makes me extremely content.

I’ve written before that twenty-somethings should extend their volunteer roles to include executive-level volunteering such as joining boards and committees for non-profit organizations. However, organizations have to provide key things if they want to attract young people to help lead them:

A sense of purpose. Good board members want to connect with a noble cause and “give back” to the community. They want to connect with a defined mission that helps someone else. For the Ronald McDonald House of Durham, where I work, it’s helping critically ill children and their families. For Traction, the organization whose board I’m on, it’s getting more 20 and 30-somethings involved in civic life.

Clarity. Recruiting board members should be taken as seriously as hiring new staff. With many organizations, people are simply asked to “join the board” without details on what they will be expected to do. Instead, potential board members should be given a clear, concise job description that outlines roles, responsibilities, or expectations.

Accountability. Good board members need to be managed effectively and held accountable for their performance. Staff at non-profits should regularly touch base with all board members, make sure they are engaged, and help them accomplish their goals for the organization. And if they aren’t, you should ass them to “piss or get off the pot.” Good board members will want their colleagues to be held accountable as well — no one wants to pull a disproportionate amount of weight.

Technology and social networking. Keeping millennial board members engaged will require thinking outside of the box for decision-making and communication. In-person meetings will always be necessary for some things, but organizations should start using conference calls, voice over IP, online document collaboration, chats, and social networking groups that can allow busy people to contribute outside of boring meetings.

Benefit to them. The best board members will stay with organizations because there is a personal and professional benefit to their involvement. Organizations should provide opportunities for networking, professional development, skills extension, fun and other benefits to board members.

A sense of accomplishment. Board members need to see the fruits of their labor. Organizations should set SMART goals (smart, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely) and involve board members in accomplishing them. Giving them specific tasks, creating an action-oriented culture, sharing the organization’s success will surely keep great board members around — as opposed to many groups, whose boards do little other than sitting around and talking about what should be done.

Organizations that don’t provide these things for board members will lose severely. Board members could feel unchallenged, unneeded, or like they’re spinning their wheels. And given how busy talented millennials are, they’ll likely move their time toward structured activities and organizations.

The smartest organizations will use these tactics now to ensure sustained participation and leadership from the best and the brightest our generation has to offer.

I spent a blog post explaining why twenty-somethings should buy homes now, but there are a few challenges that you must take care of during the process:

You need to understand the home buying process. Purchasing your first home can be a confusing, intimidating process. Before getting started, make sure you understand the real estate process, lest you fall prey to rogue real estate agents, predatory lenders, and botched deals.

Although there are many helpful vendors out there, don’t depend completely on the people who are selling you a product to give you objective information. I know several people who lost thousands because they didn’t fully understand the process.

There’s plenty of information out there to give you a good overview of the process and some tips. Check out HUD, About.com, Kiplinger, and Smart Money to get started.

You need good credit. Each twenty-something should check his or her credit report three times each year using the free credit reporting systems online. You get one free report per year from the three reporting bureaus, and your credit score — aka FICO score — is the key to getting a good interest rate. Not only will you have a better picture of your financial health, but you will also catch identity theft.

If you have credit problems — such as late payments, credit limits to the max, or even lack of credit — you can talk to credit counselors and loan officers to get input on strategies that will improve your credit score and make you more attractive to lenders. Having a few problems on your credit doesn’t automatically disqualify you, though. I was a little irresponsible with a department store credit card I got when I was a freshman in college, but using strategies from credit counselors made everything even out.

You need savings. I encourage everyone to look for those home ownership programs that will help you with a down payment and closing costs. I got over $40,000 from state and federal sources that are often overlooked.

However, there is a significant investment required. I put a little over $1000 down to qualify for the home ownership programs, and as part of your initial offer to purchase a home, you need to put some money down as “earnest money.” Also, I had to purchase a refrigerator, washer, dryer, kitchen items, and furniture, which are important but should not be the source of more credit card debt. I saved and saved beforehand until I could pay cash for most of these items.

You need to continue saving. If there’s a problem at your house, it’s your responsibility to fix it. Pipes burst? You call the plumber. AC or heat not working? You call the technician. I think you get the idea: there’s no more landlord to call in order to take care of household repairs.

If you purchase a home, you need to save at least 1% of the home’s value each year and devote it solely to a home maintenance fund for emergencies. Purchase a home warranty that will cover repairs during your first year or more — my contractor has fixed small things for me at no charge because of my warranty.

And if you have a homeowners association (HOA), figure out what repairs they cover. My HOA costs a pretty penny (over $100 each month), but they take complete care of my lawn and garden area, exterior water and sewage problems, and exterior painting.

You need to stay on top of things. The home buying process takes a lot of paperwork and people management. Make multiple copies of your tax returns, pay stubs, and loan applications, and keep them in a safe place. Turn in applications and forms in person, if possible. Follow up with all of the people you meet in the process and make sure your real estate agent, loan officer, and attorney keep their promises.

Finally, you need patience. Finding the right home, real estate agent, and loan package can be an arduous journey. Doing it right means conducting careful research, talking with many people, taking time from work, filling out countless forms, and waiting on things to be approved. In fact, it took me a few weeks shy of a year from thinking “Hey, I want to buy a house!” to my closing date. Many people give up because of the time involved, but patience will definitely pay off.

Again, I recommend that twenty-somethings purchase homes if they’re planning on staying put for the next 3-5 years. The time is now to take advantage of the nation’s housing situation. Home ownership is deeply rewarding, but be ready for the challenges that lie ahead.

The excitement around 2006 led me to take a political job. I spent two years working in North Carolina’s political realm, doing grassroots organizing (canvassing, phone banks, training, and voter outreach) and fundraising and campaign finance consulting. I worked with state-wide organizations, groups in all 100 North Carolina counties, 10 political committees, and over 85 candidates.

Let’s start with the things I gained from being a political staffer:

A “tenacity in pursuit” work ethic. Campaigns are time-driven machines that require careful planning, prioritization of tasks and quick execution. Good political staffers have to be fast, focused, flexible and ready to respond to anything while under all kinds of stress, and those skills have tremendously helped me in the “real world” workplace.

Management skills. A campaign’s success is driven by the staff’s ability to get volunteers, surrogates, consultants and candidates to perform key tasks — even when it’s pure grunt work or something the person does NOT want to do. These skills give former political workers an edge on managing employees, clients, donors, and volunteers.

Cool travel and and phenomenal networking. I put well over 35,000 miles on my car in two years and it was worth every dollar I spent in gas. I got to drive all around North Carolina, meeting great people from all walks of life — voters, local leaders, candidates at all levels, elected officials, activists, political consultants and state-wide leaders. I was able to build relationships that I still keep today, find several mentors, and learn more about the state I now call home.

Workplace research and strategy skills. No matter the specific role, political staffers have to conduct careful, intense research on your candidate, opposition, and electorate before launching the campaign. The research makes sure you’re looking at all angles to find strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats before charting a course. It’s very valuable for me in my current job as we create new fundraising programs.

Technological skills. At every level of modern campaigns, staffers have to daily use technology for data and volunteer management, voter contact, fundraising, and polling, to name a few things. I’d taken some great computer classes in college, but political work refined my web, database, and Microsoft Office skills.

Being inside of the news. Once you work in politics, you can never read the news in the same way. It’s pretty cool to pick up a newspaper and read things that you knew days prior to the press finding out. It’s cooler to read a politician’s statement and know the staffer who actually wrote it. It’s coolest when you wrote a statement yourself or were directly involved in something that made the news.

Impressing people after you move on. People, especially donors, seem to be impressed by my political past — far more than when I actually worked in politics, to be honest. It is the launching point for many conversations in social and work situations, and the skills I gained from working in politics undoubtedly helped me land the job I currently have and will continue to help in future job searches.

And finally, stargazing. When I was in politics, I regularly ran into political celebrities — congressmen, state-wide elected officials, journalists, and pundits. Less often, but still exciting, I’d run into national people like Howard Dean and governors of other states. Just by volunteering last week, I saw both Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama speak and was about 20 feet from BO. Exciting stuff.

The key, though, is to not simply stargaze; meeting these political celebrities provide great networking opportunities. I’d dare say that few of them know me from Adam — they meet thousands upon thousands of people — but I’ve taken the opportunity to network with their staffers, who’ve helped me get access to the celebrities when I’ve needed them and given me great advice.

And I’d be remiss not to mention how fun it was to run into political celebrities I’m not particularly fond of like Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, Kwame Kilpatrick, Mike Nifong, and even Star Jones. These are not my favorite people, but my encounters with them provide great content for random conversations, especially at parties.

These are the positive things that came out of my stint in politics. Stay tuned for a post looking at the negatives before deciding a career in politics is for you.

As of 2006, there were nearly 1 million 501(c)(3) organizations in the US — a nearly 70% increase from the 536,000 there were ten years earlier — and I’ve heard that number currently grows at a rate of 1,000 per month. As the number of non-profits grows, inefficiency within our field goes up while the pool of available donors shrinks. Competition will be high for donations, and only well-oiled organizations will be able to thrive in the super-saturated market.

Given the conditions of the market for non-profits, how can non-profits protect themselves for the future? One way to look at becoming a social enterprise: a non-profit organization that generates earned income to support its social purpose. Earned income is revenue that’s received in exchange for products or services

Here are some notes from David’s class:

Organizations should combine service with business. A great example is TROSA, an organization in Durham, NC, that provides residential rehabilitation to recovering substance abusers. TROSA gives their program participants jobs in several businesses, including landscaping, framing, moving, and event logistics. The men in the program get job experience and structure to continue their rehab, and the organization gets much-needed funding from their enterprises across the state. In fact, my home-owners association contracts with TROSA to do our yard work.

Social enterprise should participate in the Experience Economy. More and more, consumers are paying top dollar to have unique experiences. It’s why Wilco broke new ground — ignoring the naysayers — by providing albums for free to generate million-dollar interest in their tours. It’s why people from all over the Mid-Atlantic region flock to Durham for the World Beer Festival and why people go to the symphony. They want non-replicable experiences. Non-profits should consider eco-tourism, travel, direct service opportunities, and experiential events as new fundraising mechanisms.

Don’t take on business models that have been rejected by the private sector. In the age of eBay, we don’t need another thrift store. Goodwill still manages to make it work very well (while linking it to their direct service to the public), but unless you have the capacity to launch a national chain, you should leave it alone.

Consider other audiences for our organization. Too often, groups dismiss social enterprise because the people they serve can’t afford to pay. Don’t concentrate solely on your service constituency, but think about businesses and individuals who are willing to pay for what you give. For example, one of my classmates today runs a violence alternative training program for prisoners and at-risk youth. They could slightly modify their program and teach conflict resolution and alternative dispute resolution techniques to corporations. The corporate training and consulting could completely fund their prison and school programs.

And finally, don’t start a non-profit, start a social enterprise that can make money and then fund charitable pursuits. Starting a business is far, far easier than starting a non-profit. All of the forms, legal information, reporting, and liability with a non-profit added to the super-saturated market for non-profits is reason enough to concentrate on social enterprise.

David’s class was by far the best I’ve had in the Duke non-profit program, and he’s an excellent thinker on leadership and how we can expand the non-profit sector. Check out David’s blog to learn more about his teaching, speaking, and international consulting and stay tuned for more info on him. I think he and I will be sharing a lot of ideas in the future.

Dribbling Past Rev. Wright, Obama shares the court with the Tar Heels

It’s time for a celebration! I am about six weeks away from my first anniversary as a homeowner. At the same time, my best friend Josh, who is 23, is preparing to close on his first home down in South Carolina. I encourage twenty-somethings in small to medium cities to take a hard look at buying a home. Here are some things that might convince you to buy:

Buying a home saves you money long-term. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I had no parental support during or after college, so I’ve had to earn and save every dime to my name. Before I bought my townhome, I was splitting $1500 each month in rent with two college friends, which is pretty fair for our area.

My monthly payment including mortgage, taxes, insurance, and homeowners association dues ends up being half of my old rent. It’s a phenomenal savings, and I know that every payment I make adds to home equity. Instead of losing money each month to magically poof into the pockets of a developer, I’m paying myself. It’ll definitely pay off when I’m ready to sell.

There’s free money out there. National and state initiatives provide down-payment assistance to first-time home buyers who make less than the median income in their areas, which applies to most young non-profit professionals. The best part is that the process is pretty objective — if you qualify, you get the money — and few people take advantage of the programs.

Through programs with the City of Durham and the North Carolina Housing Finance Agency, I got about $45,000 in down payment help and my closing costs covered by public sources. I only had to put $750 down and attend classes for first-time home owners.

And the income requirement is based upon your income at the time of your loan application. If you get a raise or a better job after you’re in the house, nothing changes.

Check out the HUD website to find information on first-time homebuyer programs in your state. The site will lead you to the free money and tell you about free programs to counsel you out of bad credit or to walk you through the entire home-buying process.

The time is right (if you have a few years). It’s a buyer’s market, and we should take advantage of the housing bust’s falling interest rates and prices. There are opportunities for us to get great real estate at phenomenal prices. It will take a time investment, though, but not a long-term one.

Of course “long-term” is subjective, but many people erroneously think buying a house during the housing crisis locks you into a 30-year commitment. Don’t plan on buying a house and flipping it next year or the year after, but if you think you’ll be in an area for 3-5 years, it could be worth it to buy. Some folks disagree, but I definitely think the time is right.

Roommates can pad your budget and help you save. If you buy a house with multiple bedrooms, renting them out to other twenty-somethings or college students could give your budget just enough of a boost to save tremendously. Instead of paying a real estate developer for rent, you’re now the landlord.

And finally, buying a home gives you the opportunity to express yourself. I hated the fact that I couldn’t paint in apartment and dorm living. I mean, I could have, but I would have been forced to paint it back to the sterile white color or lose my security deposits. In my house, I’ve been able to paint almost every room and invest in art that reflects my personality and gives me pride.

But of course, buying a home isn’t right for everyone, and a first-time buyer should be prepared for some serious work ahead. Stay tuned for a post that discusses challenges twenty-somethings will have to face if they want to buy a home.

Bosses are tough. I’ve worked for yellers, bullies, silent types, huggers, mentors, and complete goof-offs. Right now, I now face the extraordinary rewards and challenges — mostly rewards, in case Dan is reading (haha) — of working for one of my best friends. No matter how great the boss, though, we’ve all been in situations where we’re not entirely happy with how our boss treats us and wish we could change it.

According to Fast Company, we can change our boss’ behavior by doing one thing: treat them like animals.

Dan and Chip Heath propose that we use the techniques of exotic animal trainers to manage our bosses and create the work environment we need. They suggest that we ignore bad behavior, reward good behavior, and stay consistent.

It makes sense to me. I don’t have any experience with exotic animals, but I grew up with pets (three dogs, a flock of ducks, a cockatoo, rabbit, cat, and even a show steer — yes a cow), and the techniques they recommend were the only way we could get the animals to do anything.

At work, it makes sense especially because many of the supervisors we encounter are continually learning how to manage and lead while facing pressure and deadlines from their bosses. We have to make sure their learning process includes how to deal with us in order to keep us happy and get top results.

So the next time my boss does something I don’t like, I’ll try to think of him like Mooey, my old show steer. By ignoring bad behavior, rewarding the good, and staying consistent, it should work. But be careful, even the most carefully trained animals can unexpectedly cause serious harm.